Sunday, November 4, 2012

Minimalism, live a meaningful life (Joshua Fields Millburn & Ryan Nicoderm)

What are you holding on to? I asked myself this as I read Minimalism: Live a meaningful life. I also asked myself what the heck minimalism was since in my head I was thinking something along the lines of Thoreau and deliberately throwing everything I own away because I want to find meaning on the inside. Thank God that's not what it was all about. Maybe a tiny bit, but it's bigger and deeper than that, and definitely worthy of a book. Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodermus: two friends who knew each other since they were kids reconnect again in their twenties and end working together at a big company where they're super successful (where success=money) yet they aren't happy.They have big houses, big paychecks, nice cars, women and status but no deep meaningful purpose. They each looked for happiness in various ways (marriage, more work, more possessions, religion, food etc.) Then Joshua's mother died and things started to slide into perspective, that we have a finite time in this life and do we really want to keep working and spending running ourselves ragged or do we want to live a meaningful life. The book is an overview of how to do this. Simple on paper, hard to put in action but the authors break it down and go through 5 dimensions that you should ask yourself about when making decisions or taking inventory of your life. The first is Health: Their point is that if you're not healthy you can't live happily so to take care of yourself you should make lifestyle choices such as cutting out sugar, gluten, breads, pastas and experiment with cutting out meat, dairy and any drink that isn't water. It's no-nonsense advice that personally, I'm not excited about since there aren't many carbs I don't like but that's me. They also talk about exercise and have some tips on how to maximize workouts to keep it fun and to the point (no time-waisting). The second dimension is Relationships. The duo have a way to evaluate your relationships where you figure out who is primary, secondary or on the periphery. Are they positive relationships? Do they add to or detract from your life? And they talk about making new relationships, what do you want and what must not occur in the relationship and how to make passionate relationships work.They remind you how to nourish, support and be present in the relationship so you are valuable to the other person and vice versa. The third is Passions: It's so easy to get mucked down in our routines. We are anchored down by our daily lives and they suggest four anchors that inhibit us from finding our passions. Identity, status, certainty and money. You are more than your job. Remember that the next time a person asks, What do you do? They ask the reader what he would do with his life if money weren't an object. They ask what excites you? How can you turn your passion into your mission in life? It's a little, The Passion Test, but worth the repetition. The fourth is Growth: The point is to always be growing and changing and to make decisions based on this change allowing time for fluctuations and standards to rise and keep it consistent. The fifth dimension is Contribution: This is going beyond yourself and helping others. Helping others adds value to your own life. It's always meaningful and the authors say a life without contribution is a life without meaning. Overall this his a great guide to refer to when your itching for a little piece of mental substance to snack on. I had never heard of the guys or their website, www.theminimalists.com, but am so glad that I was able to read and review this book. I don't think enough can be said for clearing the clutter whether it's a bunch of clothes you haven't worn in a year or emotions that have stuck around keeping your stagnant fearful of pursuing your dreams. What they set out to do is spread the word that minimalism is a tool to help you achieve freedom from fear, guilt, depression, enslavement and all the other figurative shackles that keep us from meaningful long lasting happiness.It isn't about if you have an expensive car or a hybrid car or any car at all but more about finding out if a vehicle is essential to you. Is where you are working essential to you. Does it make you feel valuable and valued. It's about less as opposed to more because it boils down to stripping away the unnecessary things in your life so you can focus on what's important. After reading it I can't say that I'm a minimalist but I'm on the path to paying attention to what is essential to me. It might take a while, what's important to me today may not be next week but it's growth and all growth takes time and some nourishment and of course, patience. So even if you don't want to get the book check out the website. They have tons of essays to read if you're looking for a little inspiration on how to clear the junk out of the trunk.

Skippy Dies (Paul Murray)

Did I miss something with Father Green??? Anyway I adored this huge brick of a book. Took me a solid 5 days to get through it. I loved the conversations between the boys and the side story about Howard and the slowly illuminating push behind it all. It's basically about boys in a boarding school who are each trying to make his way through life. They deal with parents and grades thugs and drugs and of course, parallel universes. I've always been attracted to nerds and this book bore it all-a little bit relationships, playing the song of a favorite band 100 times over, the need to fit in, the need to obliterate your mind when you're overwhelmed with everything and video games! I loved this book but was a little confused at the end. I think I missed something having to do with the priest and it didn't get 5 stars only because some parts of the story went on a bit long (the halloween hop and the dream drugged interludes) but I loved the humor as well as the darker parts. Can't wait to read Murray's other book, Evening of Long goodbyes cuz I'm a huge fan of Wooster and Confederacy as it's been compared to. I recommend this book but be prepared, it's a dense sprawling read but worth it if you like coming of age tales.